What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
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No more Irish car bombs ever.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
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The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I'm way too hungover for life right now
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