I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
