do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
It's shark week go big or go home