Texts From Last Night

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  (406): View more from Montana

  Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.

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  (406): Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it. http://tfl.nu/qcms
  Replies (2) Good night (1271) Bad night (707)
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  (310): View more from California

  If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.

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  (310): If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth. http://tfl.nu/s1or
  Replies (14) Good night (916) Bad night (2586)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping

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  (978): everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping http://tfl.nu/lm3k
  Replies (12) Good night (4069) Bad night (906)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches

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  (732): I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches http://tfl.nu/f64u
  Replies (19) Good night (3952) Bad night (1096)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident

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  (615): all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident http://tfl.nu/nfc5
  Replies (11) Good night (807) Bad night (4430)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant

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  (404): The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant http://tfl.nu/hmmb
  Replies (8) Good night (784) Bad night (3955)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.

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  (717): If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate. http://tfl.nu/gd7q
  Replies (13) Good night (2458) Bad night (624)
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  (516): View more from New York

  1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.

  (516): View more from New York

  By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.

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  (516): 1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model. (516): By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method. http://tfl.nu/fz41
  Replies (28) Good night (2425) Bad night (792)
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.

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  (905): Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists. http://tfl.nu/ucjm
  Replies (3) Good night (2145) Bad night (720)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"

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  (214): Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types" http://tfl.nu/3nt2
  Replies (4) Good night (504) Bad night (878)
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.

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  (218): There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon. http://tfl.nu/foxi
  Replies (5) Good night (1515) Bad night (355)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?

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  (804): I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day? http://tfl.nu/ul99
  Replies (2) Good night (1176) Bad night (279)
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  (650): View more from California

  Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.

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  (650): Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels. http://tfl.nu/tpw7
  Replies (1) Good night (765) Bad night (221)
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?

  (1-504): View more from Louisiana

  That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?

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  (504): Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up? (1-504): That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies? http://tfl.nu/79n3
  Replies (1) Good night (720) Bad night (200)
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  (320): View more from Minnesota

  I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?

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  (320): I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy? http://tfl.nu/wlig
  Replies (6) Good night (716) Bad night (214)

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