I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
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