i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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