Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize