I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
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