My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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