So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
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all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
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I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
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