Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
