I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
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