okay pat passed out under dana's car
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Randomize
