Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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