if i can run in heels then i can drive
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy