when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Is it penis luge time yet?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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