Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
