i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
