I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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