I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Randomize
