the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize