Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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