lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
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