Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Randomize
