Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize