I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
