Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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