she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
