And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
