He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
