Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize