He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Semen is not good for contacts.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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