I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Randomize
