I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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