no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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