hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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