i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
