Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
