Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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