Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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