We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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