We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Randomize