Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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