Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
