Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
