HIV tests are more positive than that guy
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
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