She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Randomize
