I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
