3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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