sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
