Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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