cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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