My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
We just shotgunned beers for America
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize
